Carpe Diem is not rubbish. It is the way of the person that lives the life right in front of them to the fullest.
I want to be like that.
I don’t want to fully experience only the celebrations and major events in my timeline. I want to make the most of it all: highs and lows.
Also, I want to stop thinking about all the things I want to do and just do them instead. What is the point of a thought that cannot or does not become action? I have these thoughts all the time, many of them begin with “if”. Why can’t I reframe these ideas with “when” and actually make things happen? There are so many little steps I can take in the right direction.
I am constantly thinking about how to live but in the process I am missing actually living. Ironic, no?
I hate that I squandor the little moments instead of savouring them. I know I am missing out on the joy of each day thinking, if I can just get through this or that, or if I can just finish this then I’ll live. Classic waiting-for-the-bell syndrome.
But laundry is life. Vacations are life. Illness is life. Dancing is life. A crying baby is life. Good conversations are life. Marking papers is life (for teachers, anyway).
Whatever the circumstance, it, too, is an aspect of living and I might as well decide to welcome it, and chose to accept the whole package as part of my experience here on this earth.
I don’t want to look back and wonder how I missed living in the midst of it all. Thinking something else was coming.
Thoreau wrote that he ” wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life”.
So that’s my plan. Time to suck it.